Monday, April 12, 2004 @ Monday, April 12, 2004
Sunday, April 11 2004
++Happiness... My happiness...++
Haiz...
What is this world coming to...?
One moment, you're the happiest person in the world...
...the next thing, that happiness just disappeared just like that...
I seriously don't understand
life...
Especially mine...
I've been waiting for all my life...
Thought I wouldn't have it...
...wouldn't know how it feels like to be with someone...
...But it did...
And I was
very happy...
I was so happy that everyone who knows me notice the '
glow' in me...
...that almost everyday people never fail to see me smile...
And for once...
Just
FOR ONCE... I thought I've found true happiness...
That my life is finally complete...
But then...
Ever since one incident...
Same scenario...
That happens quite a number of times...
Made one change one's mind...
...and that...
Changes everything...
I don't know what to do now...
I'm at
loss...
Now I don't know what's right... And what's wrong...
My mind went blank...
It's like... I'm back to square one...
...the
unknown...
I don't know if I can live as normal before...
I'm such a hopeless person...
Didn't think of how the person is feeling right now...
Didn't know what to do to make things right...
Haiz...
Why don't I just kill myself...?
Will that solve everything...?
What did I do to deserve this...?
Is this some kind of revenge...?
Is this some kind of test in life...?
Even so... Why now...?
What must I do...?
Please tell me...
